Selma was sitting at home with her bum ankle up on a pillow. Birdie and Ian were playing cards and Selma was trying to study for her final exam in Victimology and was seriously stressed. After getting trampled at O’Reilly’s Pub, Blake had taken her to the hospital. Her ankle was broken and she had missed a lot of school.
“I can’t believe Dr. Marvel is refusing to work with me on this,” Selma whined.
Birdie and Ian nodded. They had heard these complaints a million times now. Selma’s Victimology professor was a hard-ass and wasn’t cutting her any slack for missing school because of her ankle. She was going to do fine on the final exam, but was really struggling with the final paper and he was reluctant to give her an extension.
As she sat on the couch and fumed, she decided to try and talk to Dr. Marvel one last time. She went to her room and did her hair and makeup and put on a sexy dress. The way she saw it, Dr. Marvel was a lonely shrimp of a man. He probably hadn’t had a date in 10 years or more. Maybe this strategy was worth a try. She had been debating it all semester and, at this point, she was desperate. How would she get into grad school if she didn't get an "A" in this class? The pressure was too much for her.
After she was finished getting ready she told Ian and Birdie where she was headed. The two of them looked at her suspiciously.
“You’re not doing what I think you’re doing are you?” Ian asked, one orange eyebrow raised.
“Doing what?” Selma asked innocently.
Ian sighed. He knew that his friend Blake had developed feelings for Selma over the past month—ever since he “rescued” her from the fire. He wished he could get it through Blake’s head how non-monogamous Selma tended to be.
Selma wrapped her black peacoat around her black dress, fishnet tights, and one black thigh-high boot. Her broken ankle was still in her black support boot.
“I’ll be back in an hour or two,” she said and hobbled out the door.
Birdie and Ian continued playing cards. Birdie sighed.
“I hope she’s not going to his office thinking she’ll get a passing grade if she flirts with him or, you know,” Birdie said.
“I know. Sometimes she just takes things too far,” Ian replied.
Thirty minutes later Selma walked through the front door. Her eye makeup was streaked down her cheeks and she was crying. She wouldn’t say a word to Birdie and Ian about what happened but instead went to her room and slammed the door shut. No cajoling or encouragement from Birdie or Ian would draw her out her room for the next day and a half.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Volume 2 Issue 1: She Slithers and Meddles
Ian marched bravely across the street. It was early November and chilly. The neighbor-girl was sitting outside. Down the road was the post-office. He had letters in hand, ready to deliver and timed things just right so that she would be outside when he "just so happened" to walk by.
He also needed to get away from Birdie who couldn’t stop gushing about her latest crush.
The woman waved at him. At first he didn’t really believe what had happened and hesitated. She waved him over again. Jackpot! His plan was working perfectly. She had a letter in her hand.
“One of you roommates wouldn’t happen to be Birdie O’Reilly would it?” she asked and took a drag of her cigarette.
“Oh, yeah—she’s my cousin and my roommate. I’m Ian O’Reilly,” he said holding out his hand for a shake. She slapped it in a sideways high-five and blew smoke out her nose. He couldn’t help but check out her long dark hair, deep brown eyes and curves.
“I’m your neighbor—Georgia Smalley,” she said and handed him the letter.
“The postal worker left that in my box by accident. Any chance you could give it to Birdie?” she asked.
“Yeah, no problem,” Ian mumbled. He tried quickly to think up some reason for them to hang out. He could see the top of her t-shirt under her coat. It had logo on it from the movie The Crow.
“You like The Crow?” he asked. She looked at him, down at her shirt and up at him, one eyebrow raised.
“I’ve got the whole graphic novel series. You wanna check it out?” He realized he was speaking really quickly and took a deep breath.
“Yeah, sure,” she said and snubbed out her cigarette.
As they walked towards his apartment Ian’s heart began to race. He hadn’t dated anyone in over a year. His last girlfriend had cheated on him and he’d had a really hard time moving past that situation. He tried to think of something to say to Georgia.
“So, how long have you lived across the street?” he asked as they entered the front hall of the apartment.
“Long enough, I guess. I’ve lived on my own since I was sixteen. I’ve lived in that particular apartment for about three years now,” she said as Ian fumbled with his keys.
They stepped into the apartment.
“Looks like we’re the only ones here,” Ian said and became even more nervous. Should he make a move? No! Too soon, but maybe…
“Well The Crow is back on my bookshelf,” he said and she followed him to his bedroom in the back of the apartment.
He also needed to get away from Birdie who couldn’t stop gushing about her latest crush.
The woman waved at him. At first he didn’t really believe what had happened and hesitated. She waved him over again. Jackpot! His plan was working perfectly. She had a letter in her hand.
“One of you roommates wouldn’t happen to be Birdie O’Reilly would it?” she asked and took a drag of her cigarette.
“Oh, yeah—she’s my cousin and my roommate. I’m Ian O’Reilly,” he said holding out his hand for a shake. She slapped it in a sideways high-five and blew smoke out her nose. He couldn’t help but check out her long dark hair, deep brown eyes and curves.
“I’m your neighbor—Georgia Smalley,” she said and handed him the letter.
“The postal worker left that in my box by accident. Any chance you could give it to Birdie?” she asked.
“Yeah, no problem,” Ian mumbled. He tried quickly to think up some reason for them to hang out. He could see the top of her t-shirt under her coat. It had logo on it from the movie The Crow.
“You like The Crow?” he asked. She looked at him, down at her shirt and up at him, one eyebrow raised.
“I’ve got the whole graphic novel series. You wanna check it out?” He realized he was speaking really quickly and took a deep breath.
“Yeah, sure,” she said and snubbed out her cigarette.
As they walked towards his apartment Ian’s heart began to race. He hadn’t dated anyone in over a year. His last girlfriend had cheated on him and he’d had a really hard time moving past that situation. He tried to think of something to say to Georgia.
“So, how long have you lived across the street?” he asked as they entered the front hall of the apartment.
“Long enough, I guess. I’ve lived on my own since I was sixteen. I’ve lived in that particular apartment for about three years now,” she said as Ian fumbled with his keys.
They stepped into the apartment.
“Looks like we’re the only ones here,” Ian said and became even more nervous. Should he make a move? No! Too soon, but maybe…
“Well The Crow is back on my bookshelf,” he said and she followed him to his bedroom in the back of the apartment.
Message #6 from Devina
Hello and Happy New Year!
2010 marks the start of Volume 2 of Deviant! Make your New Year's Resolution to keep up with all of you favorite characters and keep the comments and emails rolling my way!
Thank you for your support in 2009 and I hope you continue to enjoy my Queer Soap Opera blog!
Love you all,
Devina Devore
2010 marks the start of Volume 2 of Deviant! Make your New Year's Resolution to keep up with all of you favorite characters and keep the comments and emails rolling my way!
Thank you for your support in 2009 and I hope you continue to enjoy my Queer Soap Opera blog!
Love you all,
Devina Devore
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Volume 1, Issue 8: Decide to Take a Stand
Birdie was hanging out with Mrs. Maria Nelson at Mrs. Nelson’s house. They were drinking coffee and Birdie was talking Mrs. Nelson’s ear off about the Halloween party.
“And she kissed me!”
“Yes, Birdie, you’ve told me the story about three times now. I don’t know what else to tell you, hon. There is just no way to know who it was unless you ask around,” Mrs. Nelson said wearily.
The two had met at Mrs. Nelson’s house for coffee to discuss her recent firing but Birdie was absolutely fixated on her Halloween experience. There was a silence and Birdie seemed to remember why they had decided to meet in the first place.
“So, can you explain to me again why you were fired?” she asked Maria.
Maria Nelson took a sip of her tea and tossed her blonde hair over her shoulder.
“I came out as a bisexual over ten years ago to my friends and family but I didn’t come out at work. I knew that the administration at Peabody Elementary School was pretty intolerant of homosexuality. Then, about one year ago, a former student of mine stopped in to visit me during a teacher in-service day. He confided in me that he was questioning his sexuality. He was now in seventh grade and had transferred to Saint Mary’s Catholic school after his parents had caught him dressing up in his sister’s clothing. They, being pretty much fundamentalist Christians, thought that he was being tempted by Satan and the only solution was to pull him out of the public school system and send him to Saint Mary’s.”
Birdie sighed audibly. Maria continued.
“His parents then targeted me at Peabody Elementary. They went to the school board claiming that I was corrupting Peabody’s students. I attended a meeting where it was determined that it was fine for me to teach there as long as people didn’t know I was bisexual. Now that people knew though, they had to let me go. There weren’t really any state protections for gays and lesbians in the workplace. No matter how hard I fought their decision, I was powerless in the eyes of the law. So, I had to resign or be fired, and I chose to resign. I work as a receptionist in a vet clinic now and try to focus on my writing.”
Maria stared into her coffee cup for a minute after finishing her story. She was still hurt and angry by the experience—it had been a year but it felt like it was yesterday.
“Well, there must be SOMETHING we can do,” Birdie exclaimed. She had never heard of this kind of discrimination in her hometown and, after recently coming out as a lesbian, this whole issue suddenly felt very personal, and very important to her.
She reached over and took Maria’s hand in her own.
“I’m going to do some research. We’re not going to let them win this,” she said.
“And she kissed me!”
“Yes, Birdie, you’ve told me the story about three times now. I don’t know what else to tell you, hon. There is just no way to know who it was unless you ask around,” Mrs. Nelson said wearily.
The two had met at Mrs. Nelson’s house for coffee to discuss her recent firing but Birdie was absolutely fixated on her Halloween experience. There was a silence and Birdie seemed to remember why they had decided to meet in the first place.
“So, can you explain to me again why you were fired?” she asked Maria.
Maria Nelson took a sip of her tea and tossed her blonde hair over her shoulder.
“I came out as a bisexual over ten years ago to my friends and family but I didn’t come out at work. I knew that the administration at Peabody Elementary School was pretty intolerant of homosexuality. Then, about one year ago, a former student of mine stopped in to visit me during a teacher in-service day. He confided in me that he was questioning his sexuality. He was now in seventh grade and had transferred to Saint Mary’s Catholic school after his parents had caught him dressing up in his sister’s clothing. They, being pretty much fundamentalist Christians, thought that he was being tempted by Satan and the only solution was to pull him out of the public school system and send him to Saint Mary’s.”
Birdie sighed audibly. Maria continued.
“His parents then targeted me at Peabody Elementary. They went to the school board claiming that I was corrupting Peabody’s students. I attended a meeting where it was determined that it was fine for me to teach there as long as people didn’t know I was bisexual. Now that people knew though, they had to let me go. There weren’t really any state protections for gays and lesbians in the workplace. No matter how hard I fought their decision, I was powerless in the eyes of the law. So, I had to resign or be fired, and I chose to resign. I work as a receptionist in a vet clinic now and try to focus on my writing.”
Maria stared into her coffee cup for a minute after finishing her story. She was still hurt and angry by the experience—it had been a year but it felt like it was yesterday.
“Well, there must be SOMETHING we can do,” Birdie exclaimed. She had never heard of this kind of discrimination in her hometown and, after recently coming out as a lesbian, this whole issue suddenly felt very personal, and very important to her.
She reached over and took Maria’s hand in her own.
“I’m going to do some research. We’re not going to let them win this,” she said.
Message #4 from Devina
Hello Kiddies,
I've been out of commission the past month (or two) due to illness. Never fear, the latest issue is to be posted directly after this note. I've got lots of more to come--it is all rolling around in my noggin'. I just have to keep focusing on my health so that I can get it all on paper.
Enjoy Issue 8 and Happy Hollerdays!!
Devina Devore
I've been out of commission the past month (or two) due to illness. Never fear, the latest issue is to be posted directly after this note. I've got lots of more to come--it is all rolling around in my noggin'. I just have to keep focusing on my health so that I can get it all on paper.
Enjoy Issue 8 and Happy Hollerdays!!
Devina Devore
Friday, November 13, 2009
Message #3 From Devina
Hello Loyal Readers,
Unfortunately this week has had a few more speed bumps than I would have preferred. You dolls will just have to wait a few more days for the next issue. Never fear, it is near completion!!
Devina Devore
Unfortunately this week has had a few more speed bumps than I would have preferred. You dolls will just have to wait a few more days for the next issue. Never fear, it is near completion!!
Devina Devore
Friday, October 30, 2009
Volume 1, Issue 7: Just Like a Ninja
Georgia Smalley lived across the road from Ian, Selma, and Birdie. She had never met them before but whenever she stepped out on her porch to smoke in the evenings, she could see Birdie across the road, sitting on her patio stairs reading a book. She rarely saw Selma around the apartment and took little interest in her. Neighbor Boy and Redhead Girl were interesting to observe though.
She didn’t know how Ian and Birdie were related, but she knew that had to be kin of some sort. Brother and sister? Cousins? Fraternal twins? She couldn’t tell. Their stature, blazing red hair, and freckles made them mirror images of one another. Ian seemed like a worrier—always fretting over some thought rolling around in his head. He always walked down the road to the bus stop deep in concentration, staring at the ground with his eyebrows crinkled.
Birdie, on the other hand, was a dreamer. Georgia was intrigued at the carefree and confident way that Birdie walked. She paid attention to her surroundings but not in the paranoid, hyper-vigilant way that Georgia tended to. Birdie saw every tree, every squirrel. She felt every drop of rain and every ray of sun. To Georgia, Birdie was damn near a Buddha—always present and smiling.
Georgia was putting the finishing touches on her Halloween costume. She was dressed as a masked ninja. Once she was fully dressed, she left for the Halloween party. Every year, the theater crowd at ICU threw a big party for Halloween. Chaos always ensued at these parties. Georgia was hoping that tonight would follow suit.
That morning Georgia had gotten mail addressed to Birdie in her mailbox. Georgia, being bisexual, had a big crush on Birdie and hoped that the letter would be her ticket in to getting to know her.
Little did she know, the letter would be unnecessary in getting to know Birdie. She and Ian had also been invited to the Halloween party. Birdie looked amazing as Rosie the Riveter—a little skinny, but cute as hell. Ian was…well…Georgia couldn’t tell what Ian was exactly. She came to find out later that he was attempting to look like one of his favorite and obscure writers. No one got it. Poor, clumsy Ian.
Georgia walked towards Birdie who was chatting with a group of people in the kitchen. Birdie saw her and made eye contact. Georgia didn’t miss the not-so-subtle way that Birdie checked her out as she walked towards her. Georgia’s curvy body moved in waves under her ninja suit. Her brown eyes were all Birdie could see of her face.
Birdie excused herself and walked out to the back porch. Georgia followed her. The night was chilly, and, aside from a few chatty smokers, she and Birdie were the only people outside.
“Nice night,” Georgia commented. Birdie looked at her.
“If you hadn’t have said anything, I wouldn’t have known you were even there, being a ninja and all,” she said and then looked away, seemingly embarrassed.
“Yep. We ninjas are an interesting lot. You never know when we’ll sneak up behind you,” Georgia said, taking a long drag of her cigarette.
Georgia walked towards Birdie and made eye contact. Birdie didn’t look away.
“What’s your name?”
“Birdie O’Reilly. What’s yours?”
“Ninjas never tell.”
"I think you're sexy," Birdie said and then clapped her hand over her mouth terrified she had let that information slip. Apparently the whiskey she'd had made her a little loose-lipped.
Georgia snuffed out her cigarette, leaned in, and kissed Birdie softly on the mouth. Her mask and the tequila she'd been drinking had made her extra brave. Birdie leaned into her touch and Georgia felt a vibration on her leg.
“Shit! My phone!” Birdie gasped. It was Selma.
“I’m sorry. It’s my roommate. She was at O’Reilly’s pub a couple weeks ago and got trampled when the fire alarms went off. Her ankle is broken and I should probably see what she needs,” Birdie stumbled.
Georgia nodded and smiled.
“I’ll be inside…if you can find me,” she said and winked.
After a quick chat with Selma, Birdie went back inside but couldn’t find her ninja girl anywhere.
She didn’t know how Ian and Birdie were related, but she knew that had to be kin of some sort. Brother and sister? Cousins? Fraternal twins? She couldn’t tell. Their stature, blazing red hair, and freckles made them mirror images of one another. Ian seemed like a worrier—always fretting over some thought rolling around in his head. He always walked down the road to the bus stop deep in concentration, staring at the ground with his eyebrows crinkled.
Birdie, on the other hand, was a dreamer. Georgia was intrigued at the carefree and confident way that Birdie walked. She paid attention to her surroundings but not in the paranoid, hyper-vigilant way that Georgia tended to. Birdie saw every tree, every squirrel. She felt every drop of rain and every ray of sun. To Georgia, Birdie was damn near a Buddha—always present and smiling.
Georgia was putting the finishing touches on her Halloween costume. She was dressed as a masked ninja. Once she was fully dressed, she left for the Halloween party. Every year, the theater crowd at ICU threw a big party for Halloween. Chaos always ensued at these parties. Georgia was hoping that tonight would follow suit.
That morning Georgia had gotten mail addressed to Birdie in her mailbox. Georgia, being bisexual, had a big crush on Birdie and hoped that the letter would be her ticket in to getting to know her.
Little did she know, the letter would be unnecessary in getting to know Birdie. She and Ian had also been invited to the Halloween party. Birdie looked amazing as Rosie the Riveter—a little skinny, but cute as hell. Ian was…well…Georgia couldn’t tell what Ian was exactly. She came to find out later that he was attempting to look like one of his favorite and obscure writers. No one got it. Poor, clumsy Ian.
Georgia walked towards Birdie who was chatting with a group of people in the kitchen. Birdie saw her and made eye contact. Georgia didn’t miss the not-so-subtle way that Birdie checked her out as she walked towards her. Georgia’s curvy body moved in waves under her ninja suit. Her brown eyes were all Birdie could see of her face.
Birdie excused herself and walked out to the back porch. Georgia followed her. The night was chilly, and, aside from a few chatty smokers, she and Birdie were the only people outside.
“Nice night,” Georgia commented. Birdie looked at her.
“If you hadn’t have said anything, I wouldn’t have known you were even there, being a ninja and all,” she said and then looked away, seemingly embarrassed.
“Yep. We ninjas are an interesting lot. You never know when we’ll sneak up behind you,” Georgia said, taking a long drag of her cigarette.
Georgia walked towards Birdie and made eye contact. Birdie didn’t look away.
“What’s your name?”
“Birdie O’Reilly. What’s yours?”
“Ninjas never tell.”
"I think you're sexy," Birdie said and then clapped her hand over her mouth terrified she had let that information slip. Apparently the whiskey she'd had made her a little loose-lipped.
Georgia snuffed out her cigarette, leaned in, and kissed Birdie softly on the mouth. Her mask and the tequila she'd been drinking had made her extra brave. Birdie leaned into her touch and Georgia felt a vibration on her leg.
“Shit! My phone!” Birdie gasped. It was Selma.
“I’m sorry. It’s my roommate. She was at O’Reilly’s pub a couple weeks ago and got trampled when the fire alarms went off. Her ankle is broken and I should probably see what she needs,” Birdie stumbled.
Georgia nodded and smiled.
“I’ll be inside…if you can find me,” she said and winked.
After a quick chat with Selma, Birdie went back inside but couldn’t find her ninja girl anywhere.
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